Oh to that thing which so many have fought for, died for, cried for, changed plans for, compromised for, sung about, written about, received great purpose from, and sought with all their being.
That thing that enables a woman to get up every day for eighteen years and live in service of a child, cleaning, holding, structuring her life around his.
The thing with which two people will bind themselves together for eternity, leaving behind differences, seeking something greater than themselves.
That thing that has inspired countless songs, endless literature and instruction and explanation and description, and occupies the minds and hearts of so many who are searching.
The thing that keeps the friend at the hospital bedside and in the examination room, not fleeing the discomfort and decay, but holding on to hope and unspoken promises.
The thing that made the man continue through town and out of the city, carrying on his back his means of execution.
Does it come from God? Is it something that we pray for and expect to receive in a certain measure? Is it something we grow within ourselves for others? Is it something we are taught through example? Is it something that must be practiced or is it just the natural reaction of the heart? Is it something we will ourselves to possess for all time or will it change with our life circumstances? It is something our appearances and emotions affect? Is there a limited amount of it floating around in the atmosphere for us to grab onto? Or do we simply not know how to embody it enough? Is this something you must ponder and search for or is the uneducated soul perfectly equipped for its expression?
The Bible illustrates it in detail. Ten thousand books in the self-help section describe it. Wikipedia defines it. Dictionary.com gives it 28 definitions. Valentine’s Day labels it one thing, serving at a homeless shelter will show you it’s another. Surging hormones make you think it’s one thing, daily sacrifice will show you it’s another. A life of ease makes it easy to do, but trial and suffering will make you prove you really have it.
They say chocolate induces it. And flowers and poetry. And carbon atoms which have been compressed for years and years.
But wait, I’ve heard this story before. Actually, I’ve heard it a couple of times. Boy meets girl. Boy and girl flirt and get along. They go with the flow, and subscribe to couplehood, and go through all the motions together. They talk about how they met, how much they like each other, how they’re alike, how their future would go. They engage in the activities, cuddling, movie-watching, hand-holding, the kissing, thinking and daydreaming about one another.
But the chocolate didn’t work. The equation didn’t stick, and whatever period of time down the road they find themselves upset, recognizing the faults of their partner, sad for the loss of the previous intensity, ultimately realizing that which is reality and how they are actually tasting it for the first time.
It’s too complicated to continue, so they struggle and call it quits. They seek solace in the arms of their friends, their gods, and their vices. They work themselves back to completeness, pining terribly for the lost rush of emotions, determined that next time, they will do the same thing, only better.
This doesn’t have staying power. It’s not even a very stable foundation upon which to build anything concrete. It’s not what Jesus did. Surely this is not the love that everyone is looking for.
Surely this is not the love that everyone is looking for.
Thursday, February 26
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2 comments:
I love reading your blog posts, Kista. You are a very talented writer! This topic pretty much sums up our discussion from last Tuesday...I really like this question: "Is it something that must be practiced or is it just the natural reaction of the heart?" Gah! I think we made it clear that it's definitely both! We all want to love and be loved, but it takes more practice with some people more than others. That happens to be the thing that I struggle with the most. How do I love others they way that Jesus does? It takes a lot of practice and patience but is extremely rewarding in the end. Definitely worth all the time and effort.
Keep up the good work. I can't wait to read more
I think so much is about expectations. "Love" disappoints because we continually feed ourselves lies about what it is like. We think that movies and TV shows and love songs don't shape our thinking, but Jesus talked about the eyes being the lamp of the body. Whatever we take in, that's what fills us. I'm learning more and more, especially through the Everyman's Battle class, that my old attitude toward people who are way careful about the media they consume aren't just prudish, they are considerably smarter than I've been.
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